Jun 21, 2014

Mum Jokes

One good thing about having kids with a man whose first language is not English, is that I get to do all the Dad Jokes.

Lame parental jokes - chiefly dumb puns - are an important part of the childhood experience and I have no wish to deprive my children.

I offer the golden oldies, handed down from generation to generation, such as: "Did you have a good TRIP?" when one of my kids stumbles while walking, and "Oh no, you PEA'D on the table!" when they lose a pea from their dinner plate.

I do that whole "I haven't seen you since LAST YEAR!" thing on the morning of January 1st. That's after doing "Well I guess I won't see you now till NEXT YEAR!" when I kiss them goodnight on December 31st.

I offer the obvious play-on-words jokes whenever the opportunity arises, such as, when my daughter told me she had to take the class roll to the school office: "Well I hope you didn't eat any of it on the way! EAT? ROLL? Get it?"

I make up dumb knock-knock jokes, such as:
Knock Knock!
Who's there?
Harry who?
Harry up and get ready! 

And I am always ready with an "original" pun, such as when M pretended to hide behind the Times Tables poster:
"Well, you can COUNT on M to find a good hiding spot!"  and:
"She'll probably hide there lots of TIMES!"   and:
"She's really turned the TABLES on us!"

The best thing is that my kids are just the right age for these jokes. They actually think they are funny, and every time I do one, as long as I REALLY exaggerate the pun and then pull a joke face or say "Get it?" there will be a tiny pause for comprehension to settle and then "Ha! I get it! Good one!" and peals of laughter.

It feels GREAT to be a comic genius!


Do/Did you do dumb jokes with kids?


  1. I love it. And hang onto that appreciation. I suspect the 'good ones' will become groans all too soon.

  2. I didn't grow up with those kinds of jokes so I didn't learn them until I met my first husband's family.
    Their entire lives were one big joke. Bunch of comedians, every one of them.
    So my kids got into these at a very early age. Now they're a bunch of comedians too.

    1. I remember as a kid it was annoying sometimes, especially if both parents were doing it and high-fiving each other at your expense. But now that I'm a parent I love making these dumb jokes!

  3. Jackie, is very funny. I love them.

    1. They're mostly terrible but fun :)

  4. Hi Jackie,

    I did them all the time - and still do. And now my lads are 18 and 21 they roll their eyes in embarrassment - particularly when I crack a terrible (pun) joke in front of their girlfriends.

    Will I ever grow up?





  5. I believe all those jokes are required in the Parents Manual. Don't stop them.

    We always followed "did you have a good trip" with "See you next fall." And yes we do all of them EVERY time! Hey, it is required.

    1. I totally agree!
      I like "see you next fall" :)
      We don't call autumn that so I can't use that one, but I might anyway, my kids watch so many American movies they'll get it.

  6. Sorry, hate to tell you this but your jokes here are about as good as your singing.... (said with love) xx

    1. Ha ha! Yes although the difference is my kids now realise I'm a terrible singer. The realisation about my comedic talents has not yet hit (though is probably not far off)



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