Today I went to a Tupperware party, the second one I have been to in my life. The first one was about 15 years ago when, if I remember correctly, I came to my cousin's house, drank some wine and admired some plastic stuff, and didn't buy a thing.
Showing posts with label money. Show all posts
Showing posts with label money. Show all posts
Apr 2, 2016
Dec 23, 2014
12 Resolutions: December (and November recap)
This year I'm playing along with #12Resolutions on Twitter and Facebook. The idea is to set yourself short-term, achievable goals, one each month.
For November my goal was to tidy and clean the house, in preparation for the kids' ninth birthday party.
Tick! It took a lot of work, but for a short, sweet time (two weeks) I had a thoroughly clean, tidy, decluttered and sweet-smelling house.
Even a tidy front and back yard.
It's still not bad, but it is on its way back to normal, unfortunately. I don't have the effort or will to maintain the way it was forever. I tell myself I hold other things in higher importance to a tidy house. I tell myself kids and pets are messy and life is messy. But really, I just hate cleaning, and I am lazy.
But the kids' party was a success, and I only gritted my teeth a couple of times (for a couple of kids - one not even invited - who push my buttons every time as they never say please or thank you, and their parents never get out of their car while dropping them off and picking them up).
We had a fairly traditional, low-key party, with cheap, homemade games (jelly bean blindfolded taste testing, dance statues, and the bloody mandatory Pass the Parcel). My prizes for the games were the cheapest $1 crap I could source, the lolly bags were filled with cheap toxic sweets and a couple of useless trinkets, and I only offered two drinks to all the kids: cheap fruit cocktail cordial poured from jugs, and water.
For the grown-up guests I had a cheese-cracker-and-dip platter and some homemade spinach and cheese pies (fancy!), packets of homebrand potato chips, two bottles of soft drink, one $5 bottle of cleanskin wine and 6 bottles of light beer. I usually over-cater, but this year being on a tight budget forced me not to - and sure enough, there was still plenty of everything to go around.
More surprisingly, I heard from both grown-ups and kids that it was a great party - not that it seemed so to me, but you can't really tell when you're in the thick of it, running round hosting, and are also a hybernating introvert not well-practiced in hosting anything.
So anyway, on to December.
We're almost at the end, but my resolution for December was to have a well-organised, stress-free and on-budget Christmas. This year for the first time my kids are not expecting Santa, so they have automatically lowered their gift haul expectations, which is advantageous (if a little sad!) They are still going to do alright, but we are scaling down.
Christmas this year is going to be pretty easy for us. My sister and her husband are hosting Christmas lunch, and for the evening we are going to my cousin's place. Hence, as I don't have to do anything more than bring a couple of platters and salads and some drinks, there is no reason for me to feel stressed at all.
Except you do, of course. It's a busy time of year with lots going on, and the expenses keep climbing as the day draws near. Chocolates for work, candy canes or tiny gifts for school friends (I hate that one), teacher gifts (suddenly there are a lot of teachers.... I went with boxes of chocolates this year for everyone), endless trips to Kmart and the supermarket as you remember something else... and meanwhile life's ongoing obligations and expenses continue.
So yes, it is stressful, and I am SO thankful I am not hosting Christmas in any way, and I am VERY grateful to my sister and cousin who are.
But the good news is, I am almost ready. Almost.
February: write 2 short stories (failed - wrote none)
March: write 1 short story, and start Project Management course (done)
April: visit GP and complete or schedule the follow-ups (done)
May: complete one module of Project Management course (failed)
June: working day money savers: public transport and packed lunch (done)
July: pay attention to needs, moods and emotions to manage reactions (done, and ongoing)
For November my goal was to tidy and clean the house, in preparation for the kids' ninth birthday party.
Tick! It took a lot of work, but for a short, sweet time (two weeks) I had a thoroughly clean, tidy, decluttered and sweet-smelling house.
Even a tidy front and back yard.
It's still not bad, but it is on its way back to normal, unfortunately. I don't have the effort or will to maintain the way it was forever. I tell myself I hold other things in higher importance to a tidy house. I tell myself kids and pets are messy and life is messy. But really, I just hate cleaning, and I am lazy.
But the kids' party was a success, and I only gritted my teeth a couple of times (for a couple of kids - one not even invited - who push my buttons every time as they never say please or thank you, and their parents never get out of their car while dropping them off and picking them up).
We had a fairly traditional, low-key party, with cheap, homemade games (jelly bean blindfolded taste testing, dance statues, and the bloody mandatory Pass the Parcel). My prizes for the games were the cheapest $1 crap I could source, the lolly bags were filled with cheap toxic sweets and a couple of useless trinkets, and I only offered two drinks to all the kids: cheap fruit cocktail cordial poured from jugs, and water.
For the grown-up guests I had a cheese-cracker-and-dip platter and some homemade spinach and cheese pies (fancy!), packets of homebrand potato chips, two bottles of soft drink, one $5 bottle of cleanskin wine and 6 bottles of light beer. I usually over-cater, but this year being on a tight budget forced me not to - and sure enough, there was still plenty of everything to go around.
More surprisingly, I heard from both grown-ups and kids that it was a great party - not that it seemed so to me, but you can't really tell when you're in the thick of it, running round hosting, and are also a hybernating introvert not well-practiced in hosting anything.
So anyway, on to December.
We're almost at the end, but my resolution for December was to have a well-organised, stress-free and on-budget Christmas. This year for the first time my kids are not expecting Santa, so they have automatically lowered their gift haul expectations, which is advantageous (if a little sad!) They are still going to do alright, but we are scaling down.
Christmas this year is going to be pretty easy for us. My sister and her husband are hosting Christmas lunch, and for the evening we are going to my cousin's place. Hence, as I don't have to do anything more than bring a couple of platters and salads and some drinks, there is no reason for me to feel stressed at all.
Except you do, of course. It's a busy time of year with lots going on, and the expenses keep climbing as the day draws near. Chocolates for work, candy canes or tiny gifts for school friends (I hate that one), teacher gifts (suddenly there are a lot of teachers.... I went with boxes of chocolates this year for everyone), endless trips to Kmart and the supermarket as you remember something else... and meanwhile life's ongoing obligations and expenses continue.
So yes, it is stressful, and I am SO thankful I am not hosting Christmas in any way, and I am VERY grateful to my sister and cousin who are.
But the good news is, I am almost ready. Almost.
How are you managing the last days before Christmas?
#12Resolutions:
January: walk 5 times a week (achieved - I now walk daily)February: write 2 short stories (failed - wrote none)
March: write 1 short story, and start Project Management course (done)
April: visit GP and complete or schedule the follow-ups (done)
May: complete one module of Project Management course (failed)
June: working day money savers: public transport and packed lunch (done)
July: pay attention to needs, moods and emotions to manage reactions (done, and ongoing)
August: limit time-wasting activities on my phone (done - and still going pretty well)
September: 15 mins floor exercises daily (nope)
October: get more sleep (yes)
November: tidy and clean house for December entertaining (done)
December: an organised, on-budget and stress-free Christmas!
Mar 15, 2014
The value of money
My kids have a really skewed understanding about money which I admit I don't do a whole lot to fix because (a) it's cute and innocent and (b) our finances can't handle them knowing the truth.
They think we have lots of money. Like "a hundred dollars" in the bank. That's not because we're constantly buying things or showering them with gifts, but because we are grown up and we work and we give them pocket money, and we go to the supermarket and pay for things, so we must have lots of money.
(I do tell them we don't have lots of money; but I don't want them to worry that we're poor either).
We give them $2 a week pocket money which they mostly save. Whenever they want something I say "Well, if you REALLY want it you could buy it with your pocket money", and then they get me to help them do sums, to find out how much money they'd have left if they bought this thing, and then usually, once they understand the true value/cost of what they want, they decide not to buy it. And that makes me proud, except sometimes when I have to stop myself from saying "Dude, you should totally go for it, it's only three dollars, man!"
But their notions of what money is worth are still skewed.
In their world, there is a sliding scale of value to money which goes like this:
They think we have lots of money. Like "a hundred dollars" in the bank. That's not because we're constantly buying things or showering them with gifts, but because we are grown up and we work and we give them pocket money, and we go to the supermarket and pay for things, so we must have lots of money.
(I do tell them we don't have lots of money; but I don't want them to worry that we're poor either).
We give them $2 a week pocket money which they mostly save. Whenever they want something I say "Well, if you REALLY want it you could buy it with your pocket money", and then they get me to help them do sums, to find out how much money they'd have left if they bought this thing, and then usually, once they understand the true value/cost of what they want, they decide not to buy it. And that makes me proud, except sometimes when I have to stop myself from saying "Dude, you should totally go for it, it's only three dollars, man!"
But their notions of what money is worth are still skewed.
In their world, there is a sliding scale of value to money which goes like this:
- notes are always worth more than coins. A five-dollar note is more valuable than five one-dollar coins
- a ten dollar note is more valuable than two five-dollar notes
- a gold one-dollar coin is worth WAY more than five twenty-cent pieces
- a shiny gold coin is worth more than a dull gold coin
- a two-dollar gold coin and a one-dollar gold coin are of roughly equal value (unless one of them is shiny)
- a commemorative coin is worth more than a normal coin
- the greatest value of all is a shiny, commemorative two-dollar coin. Really tempting even compared to a five-dollar note.
- silver coins (fives, tens, twenties and fifties) are worth very little; even when you group them together to make up $2, they are worth so much less than an actual $2 coin. An actual SHINY $2 coin? Forget about it!
 |
| Wikipedia |
 |
| zirconicusso/FreeDigitalPhotos.net |
Do / did you give your kids pocket money?
Jan 25, 2014
Is the cost of living rising in Australia?
To many people, this would seem to be a silly question. Utility bills are going through the roof, healthcare costs are rising, health insurance premiums rise by a ridiculous amount every year, petrol costs three times what it used to, rent is higher than ever.... of course the cost of living is rising.
To the economists who disagree though, the cost of living is stable or even falling. Food is cheaper, clothing, books, toys and music are cheaper, and wages are higher.
My Twitter feed is full of snark about Cashed Up Bogans driving their SUVs to their huge McMansions and whinging about the high cost of gas and water while Brianna and Tyson have every toy and gadget in the world.
Or middle class whingers who complain about petrol and utility bills while unable to appreciate how cheaply they get their clothing.
According to this school of thought, which includes many economists, the middle class has no right to complain about the cost of living when most things they buy are cheaper than ever.
Wrapped up in these arguments are political and moral beliefs too, about the carbon tax, house size, sustainable living, consumption, public vs private school, cars vs public transport, and value judgments about what people spend money on. There is also annoyance or embarrassment at the tendency of Australians to forget we live in a prosperous country whose economy has survived the GFC and the Great Recession lightly compared to most other places. There is also anger from those who are locked out of the housing market and forced into ever-higher rentals, at those who are paying off mortgages daring to complain.
In short, there is more than a touch of judgement from some (who forget they are also, mostly, middle class) at the middle-class who can't see what they are spending every week while complaining about the cost of living.
But...
Most people I know are middle class. I can pretend it is otherwise, and I can pretend to be something I'm not, with my history of low-paid work, my husband who works in hospitality and our 8-year-old car. But we're middle class, as are the majority of people running the commentary on Twitter, on radio and in the newspapers.
I won't pretend to be without privilege. But we don't have savings, our kids go to the local public school, and we live with low-level financial stress on a monthly basis. Like other families we know, we juggle bills: I mean really juggle them, paying the meanest ones first and letting the more lenient ones slide, always playing catch-up and always behind. It depresses me that we don't have more, that at our age we are still living, basically, paycheck to paycheck.
While I don't accept that raising kids is a "lifestyle choice" (it's actually biology), I do accept that we have chosen our way of life. We've chosen to buy a house and spend most of our money paying it off and we know that raising kids is expensive. It's why we have two kids instead of three. (Well, it's most of the reason why).
I know full well that we buy clothes, toys, books, music and stuff pretty cheaply. I know I spend more than I need to by driving to work, and buying my lunch on work days. I know my kids have far too many toys. I know we negated the savings we should have made when we cut out pay TV six years ago, by buying a million DVD kids' movies since then.
But I also know that utility bills, health insurance and the cost of filling my car have increased by 50% or more in the last few years. And our income has dropped - a lot. My salary is 60% of what I earned before 2008. Looking back now, it seems like I was on a pretty good salary back then. I was, but it was not high for the work I did, in my field, back then. I was always trying to earn more, constantly aware that I was "behind" others who earned more. I may have worked for a big American stockbroker, but I was no fat cat. It was also pre- credit crunch, so I was carrying a lot of debt, and spending way more than I do now.
I'm happier now, and I was very happy to be made redundant and apply a circuit breaker to my life. And I know I was very lucky. I got my redundancy, took a few months off work, and got to start a new job with people who knew me, working fewer hours and doing work I really enjoy. All that is amazing, and I know it.
But even for us lucky ones, the cost of living is higher than it was, and it is harder to manage the budget. The fact we are lucky doesn't make that less true.
Knowing my own experience and our much-reduced income since 2008, I often think of the thousands of others who have been laid off since then, or whose businesses have failed. Try telling them the rising cost of living is all in their heads.
I think while many costs have fallen over the years (things we buy), and we are certainly taxed lower than in the past, bills are higher, and costs in general are more diffuse now. Thirty years ago you earned less and you might have paid 40% income tax, and you didn't buy as much stuff, but your rent/mortgage payments were lower, utilities were much cheaper, and there were fewer bills to grapple with. You didn't have to compare costs for insurance, let alone "choose" your utility providers, and you had fewer bills and expenses. Bills might be electricity OR gas, water and telephone (no internet, mobile phone, pay TV, and there were fewer types of insurance to cover), and your weekly expenses might be travel/petrol, groceries and an amount set aside to cover clothing and other bits and pieces. I'm not saying things were better. And I have no desire to go backwards. But there were simpler bills, fewer things to buy and less money to spend, and budgeting was once much, much easier than it is now.
To the economists who disagree though, the cost of living is stable or even falling. Food is cheaper, clothing, books, toys and music are cheaper, and wages are higher.
My Twitter feed is full of snark about Cashed Up Bogans driving their SUVs to their huge McMansions and whinging about the high cost of gas and water while Brianna and Tyson have every toy and gadget in the world.
Or middle class whingers who complain about petrol and utility bills while unable to appreciate how cheaply they get their clothing.
According to this school of thought, which includes many economists, the middle class has no right to complain about the cost of living when most things they buy are cheaper than ever.
Wrapped up in these arguments are political and moral beliefs too, about the carbon tax, house size, sustainable living, consumption, public vs private school, cars vs public transport, and value judgments about what people spend money on. There is also annoyance or embarrassment at the tendency of Australians to forget we live in a prosperous country whose economy has survived the GFC and the Great Recession lightly compared to most other places. There is also anger from those who are locked out of the housing market and forced into ever-higher rentals, at those who are paying off mortgages daring to complain.
In short, there is more than a touch of judgement from some (who forget they are also, mostly, middle class) at the middle-class who can't see what they are spending every week while complaining about the cost of living.
But...
Most people I know are middle class. I can pretend it is otherwise, and I can pretend to be something I'm not, with my history of low-paid work, my husband who works in hospitality and our 8-year-old car. But we're middle class, as are the majority of people running the commentary on Twitter, on radio and in the newspapers.
I won't pretend to be without privilege. But we don't have savings, our kids go to the local public school, and we live with low-level financial stress on a monthly basis. Like other families we know, we juggle bills: I mean really juggle them, paying the meanest ones first and letting the more lenient ones slide, always playing catch-up and always behind. It depresses me that we don't have more, that at our age we are still living, basically, paycheck to paycheck.
While I don't accept that raising kids is a "lifestyle choice" (it's actually biology), I do accept that we have chosen our way of life. We've chosen to buy a house and spend most of our money paying it off and we know that raising kids is expensive. It's why we have two kids instead of three. (Well, it's most of the reason why).
I know full well that we buy clothes, toys, books, music and stuff pretty cheaply. I know I spend more than I need to by driving to work, and buying my lunch on work days. I know my kids have far too many toys. I know we negated the savings we should have made when we cut out pay TV six years ago, by buying a million DVD kids' movies since then.
But I also know that utility bills, health insurance and the cost of filling my car have increased by 50% or more in the last few years. And our income has dropped - a lot. My salary is 60% of what I earned before 2008. Looking back now, it seems like I was on a pretty good salary back then. I was, but it was not high for the work I did, in my field, back then. I was always trying to earn more, constantly aware that I was "behind" others who earned more. I may have worked for a big American stockbroker, but I was no fat cat. It was also pre- credit crunch, so I was carrying a lot of debt, and spending way more than I do now.
I'm happier now, and I was very happy to be made redundant and apply a circuit breaker to my life. And I know I was very lucky. I got my redundancy, took a few months off work, and got to start a new job with people who knew me, working fewer hours and doing work I really enjoy. All that is amazing, and I know it.
But even for us lucky ones, the cost of living is higher than it was, and it is harder to manage the budget. The fact we are lucky doesn't make that less true.
Knowing my own experience and our much-reduced income since 2008, I often think of the thousands of others who have been laid off since then, or whose businesses have failed. Try telling them the rising cost of living is all in their heads.
I think while many costs have fallen over the years (things we buy), and we are certainly taxed lower than in the past, bills are higher, and costs in general are more diffuse now. Thirty years ago you earned less and you might have paid 40% income tax, and you didn't buy as much stuff, but your rent/mortgage payments were lower, utilities were much cheaper, and there were fewer bills to grapple with. You didn't have to compare costs for insurance, let alone "choose" your utility providers, and you had fewer bills and expenses. Bills might be electricity OR gas, water and telephone (no internet, mobile phone, pay TV, and there were fewer types of insurance to cover), and your weekly expenses might be travel/petrol, groceries and an amount set aside to cover clothing and other bits and pieces. I'm not saying things were better. And I have no desire to go backwards. But there were simpler bills, fewer things to buy and less money to spend, and budgeting was once much, much easier than it is now.
Jun 25, 2013
Maths Brains x 3
It's so much fun and so easy teaching kids about money and counting, isn't it?
My kids are seven and a half and frankly I thought they'd have got it by now. Same with "reading the time" and "fractions".
Granted last night* was a bit of a challenge for Grade Two maths.
I owed the kids $4 each which I had pledged in return for tidying their rooms and helping me clean up the house last weekend*, which they had done very well.
After a few days of failing to amass $8 in gold coins, and as I had two ten-dollar notes in my wallet, I suggested this to the kids: I'll give you each a ten-dollar note and you each give me $6 back.
I didn't expect them to really get this, so I was well prepared with explanations, diagrams and appeals to recent lessons in school on counting money.
M. grasped an opportunity straightaway. "Yes, yes, I want to!" she said and pulled her sister into the hallway for discussion. "Tell her we'll give her the $6 tomorrow and then she'll forget," she whispered - but not out of my earshot as she imagined.
A. was interested but confused. "Why do we have to give you $6?"
"Because I owe you FOUR dollars," I said, "but I don't have four dollars in coins, so how can I give you four dollars? Well, one way is if I give you a TEN-dollar note, and you give me the change. So if I give you TEN dollars, you give me SIX dollars in change. Because TEN minus FOUR is SIX."
"Oh, I get it! Wait. I don't get it."
"Well I have to give you four dollars. Now if I give you ten dollars, that's too much, right? Cos I only owe you four? So if I give you ten dollars, you give me some back. The difference between four dollars (which I owe you) and ten dollars is six dollars. So if I give you ten dollars and you give me six dollars, it's the exact same thing as if I gave you four dollars."
I drew it on a piece of paper in two ways. One was drawing ten dots and then crossing out six of them to leave four. The other was using numbers to show them how the exchange added up. "OK. At the moment you have about $20 in pocket money, right? OK. I have to give you $4 so then you'll have $24. Like this -" I wrote down 20 + 4 = 24. "Now another way to get the same amount of money is like this: 20 + 10 = 30. 30 - 6 = 24. So if I give you $10 then you'll have $30, so you give me $6 and then you'll have $24. So either way we do it, you end up with $24. See?"
"Ohhhhh! I get it, I get it!"
M. grabbed a ten-dollar note and said "I'll give you $6 tomorrow."
I grabbed it back. "No, missy, you give it to me today, or you can wait and I'll give you $4 in coins tomorrow."
M. was suddenly indignant. "But why do we have to give you six dollars?"
I explained it again, and finally they both seemed to get it and agree. A. looked at me admiringly. "You have your smart brain on today," she said. We repaired to the bedrooms to empty out piggy banks.
A. was initially excited, but as she emptied out her coins she changed her mind. "These are all my special gold coins, from birthdays and the tooth fairy. I don't know if I want to change them."
"That's OK," I said. I can give you coins tomorrow instead."
She eyed the $10. "But I do want the $10..."
"Well it's up to you," I said. "Either way it's the same amount of money, right? It's just different ways for me to give you $4. You think about it and let me know."
Five minutes later while cleaning up in the kitchen I heard A sobbing miserably, and went back to find her crying over her pile of coins. "I don't want to spend all my money! You always tell me not to waste it and I don't want to give you all my coins!"
I explained again (a) the concept and (b) that it was voluntary. I showed her how ten dollars in coins and a ten-dollar note were the same amount of money.
"Well, I do want the $10 note..." She eyed the mountain of five-cent pieces on the floor next to her precious gold coins. "Can you make $10 out of these instead?"
Both of my kids have a crap-load of five and ten cent coins. I don't even know where they got them all. There was easily $10 worth in each piggy bank, now that I looked at them.
"Well that's good thinking," I said. "Let's count them together."
A. wanted to count all her money, so we started counting the coins and I showed her how to first put aside the larger denomination coins, and then count just the fives, putting them in piles of a dollar as we went.
We got to eight dollars in fives with three five-cent coins left over and had just started on the tens when I got distracted by the dog and had to let him outside. When I came back, the coins were strewn everywhere and A. was busy stuffing them into her boots. "I'm hiding my treasure!" she laughed. "Ohhhh, I get it, " I said. "It's your BOOTy!"
(As their dad is not a native English speaker, I have to do all the Dad Jokes in our house).
"But A.," I said, "Now we have to start counting all over again!"
"No we don't," she said. "The five-cent coins made eight dollars and we had three left over, so all you have to do is take those three away and then start counting again from eight."
I did an honest-to-god double-take. "Wow," I said. "Now you've got YOUR smart brain on!"
This from the kid who couldn't compute that ten dollars in coins and a ten dollar note were the same thing.
Also, why hadn't I thought of it?
Anyway. We counted out six dollars in fives and tens and she gave them to me in exchange for the $10 note.
Then I went through the same exercise with M, but she insisted on swapping ten dollars worth of coins for the ten-dollar note, and then me giving her four dollars. She didn't want $4 in fives and tens, so she gave me six dollars in fives and tens and four dollars in gold coins, which I then gave back to her.
I think it's safe to say there are no math geniuses in our house.
*Not really last night/weekend, I've had this post sitting in drafts a few weeks.
My kids are seven and a half and frankly I thought they'd have got it by now. Same with "reading the time" and "fractions".
Granted last night* was a bit of a challenge for Grade Two maths.
I owed the kids $4 each which I had pledged in return for tidying their rooms and helping me clean up the house last weekend*, which they had done very well.
After a few days of failing to amass $8 in gold coins, and as I had two ten-dollar notes in my wallet, I suggested this to the kids: I'll give you each a ten-dollar note and you each give me $6 back.
 |
| via Wikipedia per RBA reproduction policy |
I didn't expect them to really get this, so I was well prepared with explanations, diagrams and appeals to recent lessons in school on counting money.
M. grasped an opportunity straightaway. "Yes, yes, I want to!" she said and pulled her sister into the hallway for discussion. "Tell her we'll give her the $6 tomorrow and then she'll forget," she whispered - but not out of my earshot as she imagined.
A. was interested but confused. "Why do we have to give you $6?"
"Because I owe you FOUR dollars," I said, "but I don't have four dollars in coins, so how can I give you four dollars? Well, one way is if I give you a TEN-dollar note, and you give me the change. So if I give you TEN dollars, you give me SIX dollars in change. Because TEN minus FOUR is SIX."
"Oh, I get it! Wait. I don't get it."
"Well I have to give you four dollars. Now if I give you ten dollars, that's too much, right? Cos I only owe you four? So if I give you ten dollars, you give me some back. The difference between four dollars (which I owe you) and ten dollars is six dollars. So if I give you ten dollars and you give me six dollars, it's the exact same thing as if I gave you four dollars."
I drew it on a piece of paper in two ways. One was drawing ten dots and then crossing out six of them to leave four. The other was using numbers to show them how the exchange added up. "OK. At the moment you have about $20 in pocket money, right? OK. I have to give you $4 so then you'll have $24. Like this -" I wrote down 20 + 4 = 24. "Now another way to get the same amount of money is like this: 20 + 10 = 30. 30 - 6 = 24. So if I give you $10 then you'll have $30, so you give me $6 and then you'll have $24. So either way we do it, you end up with $24. See?"
"Ohhhhh! I get it, I get it!"
M. grabbed a ten-dollar note and said "I'll give you $6 tomorrow."
I grabbed it back. "No, missy, you give it to me today, or you can wait and I'll give you $4 in coins tomorrow."
M. was suddenly indignant. "But why do we have to give you six dollars?"
I explained it again, and finally they both seemed to get it and agree. A. looked at me admiringly. "You have your smart brain on today," she said. We repaired to the bedrooms to empty out piggy banks.
A. was initially excited, but as she emptied out her coins she changed her mind. "These are all my special gold coins, from birthdays and the tooth fairy. I don't know if I want to change them."
"That's OK," I said. I can give you coins tomorrow instead."
She eyed the $10. "But I do want the $10..."
"Well it's up to you," I said. "Either way it's the same amount of money, right? It's just different ways for me to give you $4. You think about it and let me know."
Five minutes later while cleaning up in the kitchen I heard A sobbing miserably, and went back to find her crying over her pile of coins. "I don't want to spend all my money! You always tell me not to waste it and I don't want to give you all my coins!"
I explained again (a) the concept and (b) that it was voluntary. I showed her how ten dollars in coins and a ten-dollar note were the same amount of money.
"Well, I do want the $10 note..." She eyed the mountain of five-cent pieces on the floor next to her precious gold coins. "Can you make $10 out of these instead?"
Both of my kids have a crap-load of five and ten cent coins. I don't even know where they got them all. There was easily $10 worth in each piggy bank, now that I looked at them.
 |
| Vorakorn / FreeDigitalImages.net |
"Well that's good thinking," I said. "Let's count them together."
A. wanted to count all her money, so we started counting the coins and I showed her how to first put aside the larger denomination coins, and then count just the fives, putting them in piles of a dollar as we went.
We got to eight dollars in fives with three five-cent coins left over and had just started on the tens when I got distracted by the dog and had to let him outside. When I came back, the coins were strewn everywhere and A. was busy stuffing them into her boots. "I'm hiding my treasure!" she laughed. "Ohhhh, I get it, " I said. "It's your BOOTy!"
(As their dad is not a native English speaker, I have to do all the Dad Jokes in our house).
"But A.," I said, "Now we have to start counting all over again!"
"No we don't," she said. "The five-cent coins made eight dollars and we had three left over, so all you have to do is take those three away and then start counting again from eight."
I did an honest-to-god double-take. "Wow," I said. "Now you've got YOUR smart brain on!"
This from the kid who couldn't compute that ten dollars in coins and a ten dollar note were the same thing.
Also, why hadn't I thought of it?
 |
| Phaitoon / FreeDigitalImages.net |
Anyway. We counted out six dollars in fives and tens and she gave them to me in exchange for the $10 note.
Then I went through the same exercise with M, but she insisted on swapping ten dollars worth of coins for the ten-dollar note, and then me giving her four dollars. She didn't want $4 in fives and tens, so she gave me six dollars in fives and tens and four dollars in gold coins, which I then gave back to her.
I think it's safe to say there are no math geniuses in our house.
*Not really last night/weekend, I've had this post sitting in drafts a few weeks.
Aug 2, 2010
Work-Life Balance and Plasma TVs
Article in The Age online yesterday:
http://www.theage.com.au/national/life-balance-still-not-working-20100731-110pg.html
My reaction reading this article, as to most others on this theme, was "yeah that's me". Paradoxically when reading these articles (which I devour, though they offer no solutions!) is at once deflation that the "no work-life balance" lifestyle is still the norm, and comfort that I'm not the only one. It can be hard at times to remember that you're not the only woman out there working full-time while every other mother is at home or working part-time.
(Yes, it's a "first-world problem", and not the worst thing in the first world by a long shot. But please a little slack - this is the blogosphere after all).
But what dismayed me when reading this article was all the comments afterwards. Like all comments after an opinion piece they were forthright, accusatory, bitter and rude. As always, the participants end up slanging off each other. As always, after a while someone comes in conciliatory or attempting a compromise which unleashes defensive replies or a new round of slanging off... So far so usual. (Really you should just read the opinion pieces and not all the comments afterwards!) But what was dispiriting was the number of people who commented basically that people who work are greedy and selfish and want wealth at the expense of nurturing their families.
Are we really still in that place?
Still??
Okay - so in the extremely unlikely event that any of those people will read this comment, I will explain how this thing works, with working and childcare and cash.
Some people have to work because of circumstance, even if they have small children.
These people love and cherish their children and want the best for them.
Their children are as happy and as well-adjusted as other children.
Not everyone who is working and paying off a mortgage has bought a mini-mansion.
Not everyone who is working is high-flying their way through a top-tier career.
The people in top-tier careers are working those jobs because they are the jobs they know and are good at - just as we all do the best job we can get for the hours we need to work.
There is not a simple equation of giving up paid work meaning giving up luxuries or giving up a glamorous career. The couple who sacrifice one person's work, or someone's career, to provide a stay-at-home parent are very strapped for cash; they see the working parents going out for coffee or buying something expensive and they think "Well if they just gave up that, they wouldn't have to work."
It's not like that.
In the situation they are witnessing, the dynamic is actually this:
Both parents need to work to pay the mortgage and bills. Neither parent is earning enough to cover these expenses singly. But with the combined salary, after expenses and daycare there is a little discretionary cash available. This is one of the advantages of the arrangement - as every arrangement has its advantages and disadvantages.
Believe me, before returning to work after 8 months' maternity leave, I sat with notepads and calculators and spreadsheets and did every sum you can think of, taking into account bills if at home, bills if out of the house working, benefits, tax incentives, salary, daily expenses while working vs daily expenses while home, part-time work, full-time work, etc.
If I could have stayed at home longer, I would have.
There were also things I was not willing to sacrifice - not because I am selfish but because I trust the cost-benefit analysis in my head. We were not about to sell our house and rent, or try to live with one car. I know people do this, but it would not have been right for us; the stress or added logistical difficulties would not have outweighed the benefit (for us). Every family sacrifices some things and draws the line at those they don't believe are of benefit - every family.
Until recently I used to say "and we don't own a plasma TV thank you very much!" - but I can no longer say that, exactly (it's LCD not plasma). But give me a break, we go digital next year, and prices have dropped.
So please - everyone - a little understanding and respect for our fellow parents. Whether working full-time, part-time, or not at all, the good parents and good-enough parents are all the same: making choices, sacrificing some things and enjoying others, doing the best they can with the cards they've been dealt, for the benefit of the children they love.
And don't most of us do a pretty good job?
http://www.theage.com.au/national/life-balance-still-not-working-20100731-110pg.html
My reaction reading this article, as to most others on this theme, was "yeah that's me". Paradoxically when reading these articles (which I devour, though they offer no solutions!) is at once deflation that the "no work-life balance" lifestyle is still the norm, and comfort that I'm not the only one. It can be hard at times to remember that you're not the only woman out there working full-time while every other mother is at home or working part-time.
(Yes, it's a "first-world problem", and not the worst thing in the first world by a long shot. But please a little slack - this is the blogosphere after all).
But what dismayed me when reading this article was all the comments afterwards. Like all comments after an opinion piece they were forthright, accusatory, bitter and rude. As always, the participants end up slanging off each other. As always, after a while someone comes in conciliatory or attempting a compromise which unleashes defensive replies or a new round of slanging off... So far so usual. (Really you should just read the opinion pieces and not all the comments afterwards!) But what was dispiriting was the number of people who commented basically that people who work are greedy and selfish and want wealth at the expense of nurturing their families.
Are we really still in that place?
Still??
Okay - so in the extremely unlikely event that any of those people will read this comment, I will explain how this thing works, with working and childcare and cash.
Some people have to work because of circumstance, even if they have small children.
These people love and cherish their children and want the best for them.
Their children are as happy and as well-adjusted as other children.
Not everyone who is working and paying off a mortgage has bought a mini-mansion.
Not everyone who is working is high-flying their way through a top-tier career.
The people in top-tier careers are working those jobs because they are the jobs they know and are good at - just as we all do the best job we can get for the hours we need to work.
There is not a simple equation of giving up paid work meaning giving up luxuries or giving up a glamorous career. The couple who sacrifice one person's work, or someone's career, to provide a stay-at-home parent are very strapped for cash; they see the working parents going out for coffee or buying something expensive and they think "Well if they just gave up that, they wouldn't have to work."
It's not like that.
In the situation they are witnessing, the dynamic is actually this:
Both parents need to work to pay the mortgage and bills. Neither parent is earning enough to cover these expenses singly. But with the combined salary, after expenses and daycare there is a little discretionary cash available. This is one of the advantages of the arrangement - as every arrangement has its advantages and disadvantages.
Believe me, before returning to work after 8 months' maternity leave, I sat with notepads and calculators and spreadsheets and did every sum you can think of, taking into account bills if at home, bills if out of the house working, benefits, tax incentives, salary, daily expenses while working vs daily expenses while home, part-time work, full-time work, etc.
If I could have stayed at home longer, I would have.
There were also things I was not willing to sacrifice - not because I am selfish but because I trust the cost-benefit analysis in my head. We were not about to sell our house and rent, or try to live with one car. I know people do this, but it would not have been right for us; the stress or added logistical difficulties would not have outweighed the benefit (for us). Every family sacrifices some things and draws the line at those they don't believe are of benefit - every family.
Until recently I used to say "and we don't own a plasma TV thank you very much!" - but I can no longer say that, exactly (it's LCD not plasma). But give me a break, we go digital next year, and prices have dropped.
So please - everyone - a little understanding and respect for our fellow parents. Whether working full-time, part-time, or not at all, the good parents and good-enough parents are all the same: making choices, sacrificing some things and enjoying others, doing the best they can with the cards they've been dealt, for the benefit of the children they love.
And don't most of us do a pretty good job?
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)
LinkWithin
