Feb 14, 2016

Minecraft Part 2: Getting Banned

Last week I wrote about Minecraft online gaming, known to non-parents as pvp (player vs player) - an arcane universe inhabited by ten-year-olds and their demonic alter-egos, where good times can turn to crap at the tap of a birchwood block.  

At some point in their recent Minecraft career, my kids discovered the shock and horror of being BANNED.

At this point you may want to refresh yourself with the PvP glossary presented in Minecraft Part 1.  

Being BANNED is worse than being KICKED. Being KICKED just means you've been kicked off the game (disconnected from the server), and you can get back in another time. Being BANNED means the Admin (owner/moderator) has BANNED you from the server, probably forever! (At least in most cases).

To cheer up my kid and out of curiosity, I googled "reasons for being banned in Minecraft" and the result is very funny. You can be banned for all sorts of reasons, from legitimate ones like griefing or trolling or killing other players, through minor infractions like speaking in all caps or asking for "OP" one too many times, to baffling ones that apparently involve saying or doing the wrong thing in front of the wrong Admin.


Most of the ones below came from this Minecraft forum thread.  They made me chuckle.

Some reasons for being banned from a Minecraft PvP server


Upsetting an Admin





For being impatient



For unintentional destruction



For following your architectural dreams





For not obeying the laws of gravity



For being too badass



Because you peaked



For solving a game challenge too quickly



For asking an annoying question too many times - like once



For possibly being a Brony




For saying Hi



For wanton destruction




For committing two horrible crimes at once:



For unrepentant warmongering



For being American



For annoying the French



For being called Dylan



For swearing



For hate crimes against art



For inverting a Minecraft element to reference a pop culture trope



As a result of a complex battle which ended with mutual respect



For killing everyone and taking their stuff - actually this ban sounds pretty legit:



For inadvertently playing against someone's political beliefs 




Just because




And perhaps saddest of all: FOR NO REASON




These cheered up my kids and gave me an entertaining evening's reading. 
But I still don't quite know how to play Minecraft.


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6 comments:

  1. I was banned from checkers for being a bad loser.

    ReplyDelete
  2. An entertaining evenings reading indeed.
    I suspect I would be banned for cluelessness/stupidity very quickly.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Me too. In fact given what I read here, I'd be too scared to even try.

      Delete
  3. Hi Jackie,

    Ho ho! I suspect there are no rules, just mindless, sad egomaniacal, power hungry keyboard warriors - who probably do no have a life outside the Minecraft Universe.

    I'm tempted to have a go with the sole aim to get banned for admin abuse.

    :o)

    Cheers

    PM

    ReplyDelete

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